Even when i could feel the warmth of the morning sun on the back of my head, I was too scared to open my eyes, unsure if all the things which happened would fade of like a dream. Slowly i felt around with my hands and still found that she was next to me. Taking a deep breath, i could smell her hair as she her head rested on my chest. I knew that it had not been a dream and that she was next to me. I opened my eyes to notice that she was already awake. The whole incident which happened was too much for me to absorb that I repeatedly kept on asking her if what had happened last night was true to not. We spent the whole morning talking with each other, but again I had no idea what she was talking to me as I could only enjoy the feeling of lying in her lap. I kind of had the similar deep rooted belief of a child in his mother’s womb, who might feel that, he is now lying in the heaven on earth. We checked out at noon and went to the airport to catch our flight to Bangalore. Her expression while on the flight was a potpourri of speechlessness, awe and surprise. Once in Bangalore, i was ready for the next part of the plan, which consisted of the next leg of the journey to our work city on an “especially for her” plane. That evening we concluded that trip at her hostel but not before a short bike ride into the city during which i might have asked her over a hundred times whether she enjoyed the trip for the sole reason of lauding my own success at its execution.
That night, I got my first wave of guilt of what had happened. I was unsure what and why I had done that. I decided that i needed to talk to her about that. So the next day we met for lunch and its when I asked her for the first time “what about him”? I knew that, at all points, there is always one absolutely tough and painful topic of conversation between all couples. This was ‘THE QUESTION’ in our relationship at this point. After much ball throwing she finally said that “there isn’t much chance that he will be able to marry me, so i guess its ok. But just in case he is able to, then I will have to be with him.”… So myself, madly in love agreed to be the second in command or more accurately “the spare tyre”. The agreement was reached quickly primarily considering the pain of discussing the topic rather than the logic or practicality involved in standing to the decision. Within a couple of days of this, we had already planned our next trip to a famous hill station. The exact same sequence of events started following up, which included the shopping, the hyping and of course the proxy arrangements. Hence started that trip too during which i was able to provide her with her first private candle light dinner, an elephant ride and an amazing tour. For a big time accountability oriented person, cash flow and bank balance no longer seemed important. Four days at the resort ensured that we became the local attraction as the cute young ‘honeymoon’ couple so madly in love. It was on the second night of this that we mutually decided, purely out of respect towards each other that, under no circumstance will we cross the ultimate limit in our physical relation, until we get married. Though extremely tough, in a bizarre way this seemed logical as it was better to go nuts looking to marry her than to go nuts feeling guilty about it commonly to go all the way with her. The trip lasted four day.
Soon after that, her work schedule got much tighter and tighter but i no matter what i always used to ensure my presence in front of her whenever she wanted a moral support. A drop of tear from her eyes in which “I miss you” was engraved brought me down in the very next flight from Delhi and Mumbai. I could never go for any trip unless i could physically give her a good-bye kiss. The tough nights she had, the pressure she faced from her office, the small problems she had at home, the fights with him, the time of the month depressions, all meant it was time to snuggle close to me and start her five minute countdown to a smile. I ensured, no matter where i was, that she never faced any difficulties, that she always got what she wanted. On the week on my birthday, we took our longest trip during which we went back to Goa. But this time instead of staying at a resort, I decided to give her a firsthand preview of what i liked to call “Life with the Ninja”, which was nothing but how it would be to live with me as my wife in our house. With that aim, i rented out a large apartment there and decided to spend what would be a trial period of our life together. We started out on the day before my Birthday in a first class cabin of a Rajdhani Train. At the stroke of midnight, on a birthday which i would never forget for, i got the best gift in my whole twenty four years of existence. She hugged me, and gave me a my best birthday wish… She gave me twenty four kisses. Though i would have loved something physical also along which that, something i could keep with me and show people around, i could not complain as I might be the first guy who would have got ‘this’ present on his birthday. The trip though was fun, was clouded by the various workplace tensions she had brought in with her trip.
Soon after the trip, we somehow found ourselves amidst the same question which had haunted us earlier. I believe the reason for the same could be attributed to the fact that reality was catching on to us. We decided to give him a date before which he would have to move in with a decision. The date was set and i began what could only be termed as an eternal wait, something vaguely similar to the wait which you feel when standing in an unrealistically long queue outside a public toilet when your nature’s call is ready to unleash its fury on your pants. It was a gamble between going crazy and going nuts, either way i knew i would be losing it. I sought refuge from my parents by telling them half-truths about us. I am not sure if i actually got support but it felt really good inside. The day before the fateful day, i secretly dropped her at her local bus-stop, bid a farewell and left for home to sit out the remaining twelve hours to the D-day.
She didn’t call me that night, nor did she pick up my call in the morning. Finally my phone beeped. A message from her read “He called my mom yesterday evening, he wants to marry me. I am sorry”. Though the message comprised of hardly fifteen words, I was unable to comprehend the meaning it conveyed. It was as if all my vocabulary skills, all my deduction capability and all my common sense for that matter, was non functional. I called her and told her, that i could not understand what she meant. She narrated the entire incident which could be summarized using the exact same words, in the exact same order as in the message she sent me earlier. It was over, and just like that. My mom had to bear witness to her son crashing and burning that day. With her permission, i called up her mom and confessed to her about our relationship carefully ironing out the wrinkles which any parent would not want to hear. She replied “You should have told me atleast a couple of days earlier, I could have done something. Moreover, She is the person who is supposed to tell me this. If she does then, i shall see to it. Until then, I am sorry…” I wondered why everyone was telling sorry to me!!!
That same evening, she called me and told me that, she wanted to just see me one more time the next day. Though my mind kept asking me why, I agreed. So the next day, i once again picked her up from her hometown. It didn’t take long before excess fluid in our body started leaking from the eyes. I am unable to remember the exact conversation, but one thing led to another and we figured out that we couldn’t stay away from each other and just like that, we were a couple again. The ‘excuse’ answer to the question was “he always used to give such words but nothing really happens”. Once again we fixed goals for him to achieve and fixed another date, which was well over four months away. But this time, i didn’t want the date to come up. It is really paradoxical why one’s sub-conscious mind always perceives time in the exact opposite way as what is requested by the conscious mind. That date seemed like the vortex in a whirlpool, slowly sucking me faster and faster into its bowels. The amazing good times we had, with all the shopping, the trips, the laughter and everything in between seemed to fuel this acceleration. Before I could even prepare myself, I was peering over the edge to yet another D-Day. I peeked into the rearview mirror only to catch a glance of the different places we travelled to, the many small lies we said, the different locations we stayed at, the tons of people who now knew the secret and almost being caught for Immoral trafficking by some really immoral policemen. Yup, i realized, all that did happen!!!
The key goal set in front of him was to get his parents to call her parents, and of course talk, which was probably the most important chapter in the case of an Indian Marriage. Though i was unable to predict to any accuracy what would be the outcome, i sincerely hoped, his parents finds some kind of shortcoming in her parents and would look for a way to end the relationship. I dreamed of being like spiderman who could swoop down and rescue her from his parents just as he would rescue Mary Jane from the claws of the Green Goblin in ‘Real-Life’. But times change and even make Green Goblin to come forward attempting to rescue mary Jane. The call did happen but the result of which did not go the way i expected. His parents were interested in going ahead with the proposal. Once again, everything ended or it had to end. That day in the evening, we went out for what was supposed to be yet another last drive together. I told her that, if she wishes me to leave, i would do it as the last thing I would want is her to get hurt. I half expected a nod of agreement but what I got instead, turned around the whole story yet again. She hugged me and told me that she cannot leave me. This time the reason being the fact that there is a slight point of rift between the parents which, was basically based on their biasing towards the year of marriage. He had promised to give her a solution within the next four days. So Yet again, we had a new date.
I knew the whole exercise was going to be a fruitless meddle for my mind though somewhere in my mind, i still had a glimmer of hope. Four days passed, there was no response. The group of days which passed came to known as a week and then it doubled.. Still there was no response. So one day, quite some time after the ‘deadline’ we decided to talk again. In the corner of a quite cafe’, amidst a couple of cups of cappuccino and burgers i asked her, if she could be mine… Whether she could marry me… I Proposed to her… I watched to see if there were any hesitation in her reply, whatever that maybe. But it seemed that she was expecting it from me, and already had her answer ready for it. She said YES…
I had come a long way from when a single look from her would send adrenalin rushing through my veins but that one simple word was what i was searching from the day i met her. Describing or understanding the flurry of physiological changes in me upon hearing that particular three letter word would make a biology text by itself. Being a public place, where we could be quite known implied that i needed to keep my feelings in control. She, once said that, stepped outside to call him and tell him of her decision. She told him that he was not reliable as it always was required for her to set deadlines for him to move forward and those deadlines were ones which he took up fearing losing her, which she couldn’t see as love. Once done, we headed back, where in which i once again confirmed with her on what her answer was. Thankfully it was not a dream.
Three days later, as the first step towards our life together, or more like, towards preparation of our life together, i booked a new car and I booked it in her name. Couple of days later, we opened our first joint account at a nearby branch. We even started searching for names for the two boys and three girls we were going to have. Childish as it may sound, madly in love and going to get married does this to ever sane mind!!! We secretly started inviting our closest friends to our yet to be finalized marriage. The planning and thoughts were bursting out like champagne from a bottle after it has travelled on an Indian road for a day. A well cooked salad of ‘blissful’, ‘childish’, ‘ecstatic’ and ‘dreamy’ might give a brief idea on how our mind might have felt those days. She stopped taking his calls and was so over him. Every day was a new day for us to dream more until that day came…
One day morning, she called me and in a hushed voice told me, that He had come here. And that he was standing outside her office… Her voice silently screamed “Please, help me….”. I told her to hold on and frantically rushed out to get to the office…
(To Be Continued…)
-Ninja-
